All posts by CathyAnnis

I'm a seeker of truth, both within myself and the world around me. I think we need to refocus our energies on community, with grassroots movements that cut out our reliance on corrupt governments. I'm all about karma. Put into the universe what you want to recieve.

I’ve reached the point that I need help from the #foodbank. Something inside me has died

I'm a JSA Claimant

Food bank use is at record high says the headlines. Trussell Trust released figures recently that show that 1,109,309 three day parcels were handed out. The primary reasons are shown below.

primary-referral-causes-768x384

For nearly 3 years now I’ve been tweeting about food banks and the efforts made by local communities to support them. For almost 3 years I have shown examples of families who have needed them, some with dramatic stories that normally involve the DWP or another Government department not doing their job or being overly officious. For all that time I have tried not to become one of their statistics but now it has reached a point where I feel I have no choice.

Mine is not a headline grabbing story. Rather it is one of slowly getting into more debt, by a few pounds here and there each week. Since I went off JSA I have struggled to…

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Smeared – 5 Reasons Why Smear Campaigns Are So Effective

Knowing the Narcissist

 

It is highly likely that you have been on the receiving end of a smear campaign. It is unusual if such a campaign is not used by our kind when dealing with the person who holds the position of primary source of fuel. The benefits of instigating the smear campaign are numerous and indeed in many instances the smear campaign is a necessary device for the maintenance of appearances, fuel and control. Since we are creatures of economy when it comes to the expenditure of our energies we operate those manipulations which are the most rewarding in terms of energy versus effectiveness. Smear campaigns rank high on such a list and this is for the following five reasons.

  1. Conviction

The smear campaign is rolled out in a convincing fashion. It is done with speed, it is done for the most part without your knowledge and it is effected by…

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The very first one…….

heatherscreationsblog

I am very nervous about doing this, I am not a natural writer! My youngest daughter has just launched her new business, Pooches Unleashed, walking dogs for people who have to leave them at home for whatever reason, she has also just adopted a retired racing greyhound straight from the kennels.

Thunder Blackie needs clothes, indoor and outdoor, to keep him warm and dry, as the weather turns colder. I have decided that not only will I make these for Blackie but I will also make one off designs, with a’Pooches Unleashed’ label, for sale to selected customers. I would hope that eventually I can progress this into a business that will run alongside my daughter’s and help her business to thrive.

Ok……..so I am not a natural designer, or seamstress, either! I have just created the first raincoat for Blackie, waterproof with a soft fleece lining, all hand sewn…

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Boaty McBoatface: Harmless fun or shameful sign of the times?

I wanted to share this article I found earlier today on Vice and really identified with, The Boaty McBoatface vote makes me ashamed to be British. I’m going through a Luddite phase myself at the moment, the constant connection to the rest of the world is infuriating to me right now, so the writer got me on side before he’d even made the point that society should be ashamed of how, in a vote to name a £200million research ship setting sail in the Antarctic in 2019, Boaty McBoatface came out on top. Second place went to Henry Worsely, after the explorer who died in January this year attempting a solo crossing of the Arctic. After learning of this I felt an overwhelming urge to contact the scientists and researchers that will be sailing on Boaty McBoatface and offer them my sincerest apologies on behalf of the world I live in. I restrained myself, but only because I decided I’d be too embarrassed to identify myself in any sense with that stupid name! I can’t bring myself to comment on this further, the article says it all much better than I could, but this has just confirmed to me that the world my children are growing up in is a ridiculous place, all too full of the stupid and the evil.

The Problem with Instant Gratification

I identify with a lot of what the writer says here; I enjoy writing, my fingers itch to write, but I tend to take long breaks between writing things that end up getting published because I don’t like how I end up reacting after I’ve posted. It becomes another trigger for anxiety, and that isn’t how I want to feel about my writing. So it becomes a bit of a vicious cycle but the fact is that I feel mentally healthier and more emotionally stable when I’m keeping up with my writing and, conversely, when I find myself struggling to stay positive and becoming worn down, it’s usually the case that I haven’t been.

Style with Substance

Or “Why my blog fell off for a bit”.

Instant: speedy, happening now, the new Millenials.
Gratification: gratifying
Instant Gratification: causing immediate joy/pleasure

Isn’t that our greatest problem today? We post a picture, those 1 zillion likes (real and/or fake) have to come in the second we hit “post” or few seconds before if they could. We start a business today, it better hit Wall Street tomorrow. We think of an idea, the world better jump on it this second. Or in my case, you blog and share your thoughts, the world better comment on them NOW else you stop. Instant gratification is so prevalent that it is fast becoming the motive and almost the sole driving force for most individuals and businesses. It shouldn’t be so.

Before you continue reading, I want you to drop your self defense because we are all suffering from some kind of instant gratification, in varying…

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The pot

My ankle is broken. Not the bone, the ligament. I have to say, the pain of walking on it for the past few weeks wasn’t anywhere near as annoying as this pot has been since last night!

It’s not even a good pot. When I was a kid, part of me was always a little bit jealous if anybody at school was lucky enough to break a limb and came to school with a cast that we could all draw on. It looked like fun.

I’m not having fun. My cast is ugly. It’s soft on top, so no writing on it, and it’s wrapped in bandages that are already grubby looking, and it is very difficult to get around with because it is so heavy.

I’m looking for the positives. While I can’t get out and about I’ll have more time to catch up on my homework, my cleaning, my writing. I’ll be able to spend more time playing with my pet rats. I’ll have lots of time for research. So it’s not all bad.

But if I’m totally honest about, aside from the annoyance of one leg being 3 stone heavier than the other, this has scared the crap out of me. Because it feels to me like this is just the beginning. I know when my ankle first went it was due to my having hypermobility. I felt it go. My condition means that the muscle and tissue surrounding my joints is overly flexible so there’s no stability in any of my joints. They click and pop constantly. It feels like the top of my legs are very precariously balanced on the bottom half and could slip off at any minute. When I was younger it was thought I was just “double jointed” and I had quite a lot of fun with that. Being able to bend my fingers in weird ways always got a good reaction but it was being able to cross my ankles behind my head that was my party trick.

It’s not fun anymore. It’s getting more and more painful. Nobody seems to understand why it’s so painful because it isn’t meant to be, apparently lots of people have the condition with no problems at all, but I feel slightly vindicated as one of my sisters also has it and struggles a lot with her hips. I often feel like people think I’m exaggerating. So I tend to only mention to people I’m close to, when it’s really bad, but the fact is I am constantly in pain, every time I move causes pain somewhere because, of course, the human body has a lot of jointed limbs, and dealing with constant pain, pain that never goes away completely and burns you with hot pokers every time you move, is the most exhausting thing I have ever known. And I had 3 children under 4, I know exhaustion! Two years ago I was the fittest I’ve ever been. I worked out for an hour every morning, I took the dog out speed walking, I walked into town and back twice a week and the 6 miles over to mum’s twice a week. Which just makes this more devastating. My legs are worst affected, my hips have always been bad and are still definitely the most painful, closely followed by my knees and shoulders, in winter my hands are really bad, and my ankles of course, but I can also feel my wrists and elbows getting in on the act. It’s been steadily getting worse for the past year or so, and I feel like I’ve physically aged 10 years in the past 2.

But now, with this new development, my ankle joint giving way to the point that the ligament snapped, I am terrified. I’ve completely overreacted to the “housebound” thing in the last 12 hours, when usually I’d be grateful to have an excuse to be lazy, because I’m scared. I took a few steps with the crutches the hospital gave me and my left hip, which is the bad one although I suppose we now have to call that my “good” leg since the other is in a pot, couldn’t take the strain of my whole body weight. So, even assuming that the fracture clinic put me a proper pot on tomorrow that I can put weight on to try and get about, how am I then supposed to walk with the crutches when my hip can’t take it?

What if my knee goes next, the right one that’s really bad? Will I need a whole leg cast? Maybe they can just put my whole lower body in plaster to be on the safe side??

I have a year clean from drugs. I’m training and studying all the time to improve my knowledge and skills so that I keep moving forwards in my life and try to make up for the stagnancy of my 20s. I have responsibilities, job prospects, I have a whole fucking life that I want to be out living!

I have this fear that I’ll be in a wheelchair before I’m 40. I know people live good, full lives from their wheelchairs and I’m sure I could too, it’s just not something I’ve ever had to contemplate before and it’s really scary.

I’m trying not to think about it because, right now at least, it’s only a product of my imagination and not something I’ve been told I have reason to worry about. But I do. How will I play with the kids? They love to go to the park, the library, anywhere! What about when they have kids? How will I be able to get down on the floor to play with my grandbabies?

I have wondered if this is my karma, or if it’s a product of how I have lived and the stress I have put my body under over the years. Is it my genes? That seems most likely, but then nobody else in the family seems to be as badly affected as I am. Or maybe it’s just sheer bad luck. Whatever, I’m going to have to find a way through it, one way or another, because I have no intention of going back to daytime tv!

Enforced Transparency 2—When Hacking Becomes Imperative

The Cryptosphere

Jeremy_AnonJEREMY HAMMOND – the original enforcer


Before Snowden, before the mainstreaming of Hacktivism, and before most of us even knew what private intelligence contractors where up to, one brave activist stepped up and blew the lid off a story so big it actually rivals the tale of the former NSA contractor.

Hammond executed Enforced Transparency by hacking Stratfor and releasing millions of emails.

“A lot of people don’t even know who Jeremy Hammond is. He’s the original Snowden. #TrapWire #Stratfor #Anonymous”
— Anonymous (@YourAnonNews) April 20, 2015


Yesterday journalist Kit O’Connell wrote a great piece about Hammond’s case:
Kit O’Connell from MintPress News interviewed freelance writer and journalist Douglas Lucas and activist Azzurra Crispino – both fervent supporters of Jeremy Hammond. The article compared and contrasted Jeremy Hammond, the Stratfor hacktivist and Edward Snowden, the NSA whistleblower. The article also touched upon the question as to why mainstream media covers their very similar actions in very different manners. You…

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Send Jon a birthday card (It’s easy! Just type & click!)

Support Jon Cowden

Jon’s birthday is on February 18th and we want to make it as special as possible. Since we can’t throw him a birthday party in prison, we’re making it a Birthday Card Party!

You can send cards to Jon directly (details on that below), but we know that it’s not always convenient to find a card, pen, envelope, and a stamp at the same time, so we’re making it as easy as possible for you:

Feeling more motivated or creative and have access to a stamp? Write to Jon directly:

Jonathan Cowden 37215-298
FCI Victorville Medium I
FEDERAL CORRECTIONAL INSTITUTION
P.O. BOX 3725
ADELANTO, CA 92301
(Click for more info on sending mail to inmates)

No stamp, but still fairly motivated and somewhat creative?

Send Jon a free card through Postcardly!  (You’ll need to create an account – but your first 3 cards are free. Upload your…

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Making Change

Yes! You are so spot on, I’ve been doing too much moaning today, and if I’m spending this present moment complaining about the last moment, I’m not doing anything to make the coming moment any better!
I’ve got to keep focussed on where I’m heading and reflect on what it’s worth to me to get there. It does me no good to dwell on what’s uncomfortable in my life when I have so many positive influences to think about instead. And things have got better and better and will keep getting better and better for as long as I keep working at it.
I’m so grateful to have the people in my life that have enabled me to develop an awareness of what’s going on in my own head and whether I am sabotaging myself by allowing it. I have said this a few times recently, but the most empowering thing I have learned so far in my journey is that I can control my own thoughts and feelings; I am not powerless over my emotions.

Thank you Blogger Haris for the reminder ☺

Blogger Haris

If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude.

It is up to us, everything is also down to us.

We make the changes and they reflect on us,

We leave footprints in the sand and we tread on the twigs….

What we do or say will reverberate till an impact is made…

Now we decide what kind of impact is made.

Let’s put saving the world to the side for a minute and let’s focus on the little things. I suffer from depression right, recently I haven’t taken my medication, yet I have the audacity to complain to people about my situation. The help is there… right in front of me… but it is I who is preventing myself from making progress.

Today I completely changed my behaviour as I have realised it is time I took ownership of myself and started to…

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Cherishing Life

Blogger Haris

“You’ve gotta dance like there’s nobody watching,
Love like you’ll never be hurt,
Sing like there’s nobody listening,
And live like it’s heaven on earth.”

Most of us at some point take a real deep breath and whether it’s out of turn and irregular or genuine wish they were dead but truth be told, life is the best gift we could ever hope for.

Be thankful that your eyes flutter in the morning or the fact its your breath leaving stains on the bus or car window.

Though we go through phases and mood swings it usually ends and turns into something positive and meaningful. However this done not mean it will get handed to you instantly, we have to work for it in order to make this a reality,

My reasons for living are the fact I have wonderful friends who I love and treasure dearly and although that…

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